What would I bring with me? An empathetic approach to wedding photography...
Last month my family was put in the position of having to decide whether not to evacuate out of the path of hurricane Florence. Before our final decision was even made, we prepared our home for the storm and packed our belongings in our RV so that we could make a hasty retreat to higher ground if needed.
Among the precious items that made the final cut to come with us on the road, were our family pictures. There few things more in life that I treasure more than these photographs. Much of these pic's are in photo albums and a quite a few are framed on my walls. I even have file box filled to the brim with old photos from my childhood. Some of these memories are professionally captured images that look amazing but most are simple sweet moments caught in a time and place that I want to always remember. As a whole, it's the value of who is featured in these pictures, not always the asthetic quality of the photograph itself that makes them priceless in my mind. Aside from my family, my work gear and clothing, these photographs were the only things that were absolutely not going to be left behind just in case disaster struck.
As I was packing away my personal photo's, I started thinking about the true value of a captured photograph and how it relates in my approach to actually taking pictures for my clients while working. In the age of Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, and Facebook it’s easy to get fixated on photography that catches the eye and think to yourself that this is what photography is all about, that this is all we need. I'm just as bad as anyone else when it comes to this mindset! Afterall, it’s easy to get caught up in the romance of pictures of good-looking people doing incredible things in beautiful places (I’m looking at YOU Instagram, lol!).
The trouble is that the genre of “styled shoots” found all over the Internet presents a false image leading people to believe that they are from actual wedding days featuring real couples with average budgets. This is a BIG reason why I NEVER show styled shoots here on my website. I want you to see the real stuff, not that scripited marketing fodder. The truth is that although it’s my job to capture incredibly beautiful photos in ANY location of lighting situation, rain or shine, indoors and out, that kind of perfection which is highlited in the controlled styled shoot situation just can’t be re-created during a real wedding day.
I’ve also figured out that for most of my couples, those hero shots that will get all of the likes on Facebook might not end up being the most important photographs that I capture for them on their wedding day. These images might not even be there most treasured photos 10 or 20 years in the future. On top of that, there are always the trendy requests for images that at best, will leave couples asking themselves later why they even asked for the trend “look” reflected in their photos in the first place. I belive that honest capture of candid moments are of the greatest value.
Why empathy matters...
I believe that it’s our personal journey and a life history filled with emotional moments that shapes the hearts of the people we are today. Perhaps through the nurturing of our own beliefs and feelings, we can dictate how well a wedding photographer can relate to a couple and to their wedding day in its entirety. From my standpoint, I think empathy is the precise quality which enables a great photographer to connect with the characters of the wedding day love story unfolding in front of the lens. It is empathy which guides my focus and helps me decide, within a fraction of a second, which photographs to take that will be important to my couples, their families and friends today, tomorrow, or 50 years from now.
When working alone in a room packed with wedding guests, this empathetic connection with the scene helps me decide which way to point my camera, the people to focus on, which lens to choose and what elements to include in the captured frame. In addition to understanding lighting and proper exposures, my job is to anticipate and shoot through these moments, to capture the very height of emotions and preserve it for all time knowing that these photographs will be protected and passed on by my couple and their families for generations to come.
It is been said that the importance of these kinds of photographs aren’t fully understood until the circumstances of our lives changed and all we're left with is our ever-fading memories. Photographs have the power to help us relive that feeling, the scent, and even the sound of someone’s voice along with every minute detail which stirs the soul of a time long since passed.
It’s the glowing smile on your husband’s face the very first time he sees you coming up the aisle, your grandparents twirling under the colored lights on the dance floor, or the way your Dad looked at you with tears in his eyes as he delivered your wedding toast. These are the types of things that can only be captured if the photographer has the ability to absorb the atmosphere, shoot in the moment, listen, feel the flow, and get wrapped up in the magic of your unique wedding day experience.
I understand that to be put in this honored position in the first place requires that I build a relationship and earn trust with the people that I’m photographing. This is the part that I love about my profession. It’s the process of getting to know my couples and understanding what is truly important to them that allows me to be the best photographer I can be. Simply put, the only way I know how to do my job best is to begin with a camera in my hand and empathy in my heart. The rest just falls naturally & happily into place.
And just like the smile on my son's face in a picture I took of him at sunset while taking an evening walk around our neighborhood, I can’t get enough of it.
:)
-Sally Siko